save

i thought in you

i could escape

from me,

from the loudness

in my head

and the silence

in my heart.

i thought i could

drown my sorrows

in the depths of your eyes,

that your soft lips

would graze my scars

and their warmth

would heal me.

i waited for your arms

to hold me,

for your beauty

to paint me

like a rainbow

after a storm.

i wanted your spirit

to revive me

but i died waiting

and my body

was never mine

again.

you are not a savior

and i cannot be saved.