R&T!

i hurt my back at work one arvo

and my sick days were all gone

i needed relief and needed it quick

and something that wouldn't take too long

i spied a flashing neon sign

on my drive home that very night

the gaudy colours spelt M A S S A G E

i thought that might put it right

my intentions were strictly medical

i was in a lot of pain

i wanted her to ease my back

to alleviate the strain

i only went in for a massage

my back was tender and sore

i didn't want a wristy

from some dodgy asian whore

but when she tried to take my towel

and give me a little hug

i knew right there i knew right then

i was in a rub and tug

she yabbered away in some asian lingo

and grabbed another cloth

she tried to grab my knob again

i dodged her deftly and hissed fuck off

it’s easy to see with hindsight

the cheapness that reeked of sleazy

everything horribly pimped and gaudy

while at the same time all extra greasy

the realisation opened my senses

and the smell assaulted my nose

buckets full of spoofed on towels

were lined near the door in rows

no engrish she screeched

and jumped across the massage bench

trying to grab my slug again

the dirty sawn off wench

she was determined to flog my log

but i was trying to flee

i was having a hard time covering up

cause she would not leave me be

on the other side of the room to my clothes

i needed a plan real quick

i didn't want her syphilitic fingers

anywhere near my dick

having no other options open to me

i hit her with an imitation lava lamp

i attempted to push her under the bench

but she was all yucky and damp

i grabbed my clothes and raced outside

not even bothering to get dressed

i ran through the half full waiting room

none of them looked impressed

naked; i ran quickly up the street

clutching my clothes close to my chest

i ran all the way to where i parked my car

next thing you know i'm under arrest

public indecency and streaking

what a complete and utter mess

shoulda just had a quiet rub and tug

it would have cost me less