Pancake v backside
A letter to my backside
Dear derriere,
I have something to say about food
and it's effect on your bum-li-ness
But first let me address the elephant in the room
Well...hello there,
mouth-watering lovely thing
Good morning
How appetizing you appear
i so miss the days when I could
(please pardon my manners)
eat an unwholesome pancake breakfast
and still visit the loo without wondering
if bodily functions will cooperate and evacuate
or if you will just fly from lip to hips and thighs
and make yourself very comfortable expanding
my already ample burgeoning backside
burgeoning (beginning to grow or increase rapidly; flourishing)
now I just have to settle for raisin bran
and wholewheat toast
those healthy bland nourishing treats
now I can only have the little blueberries
which happily and invitingly garnish your gooeyness
while watching the kids gulp down your wonderfulness
where have the years gone? they flew so swiftly from
young and carefree, to careful and picky, hearing
the clock counting down from your 'pancake-y' joyfulness
please know that I miss you, and that
Parting is such sweet sorrow
Well, that's all for now
Forever yours,
Abstainer of your joy and pleasing sumptuousness!
.....................................................................................................................
About the Creator
Novel Allen
Every new day is a blank slate. Write something new.
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The slave who Boxed and shipped himself
My dear Henry Box, My heartfelt condolences and admiration for your fortitude and strength of character. As I reminisce on your life, I am filled with wonder and awe at the lengths you had to go to in order to gain your freedom. A man who wass willing to live, sacrifice or die for what he truly believed in. I wanted to consider you a hero, but unfortunately, other disturbing information has come to light.
By Novel Allenabout a year ago in Poets
Comments (10)
This made me so hungry for pancakes. ❤️ I'm so sorry you are not able to enjoy them, this truly tugged at my heartstrings! 🥹 I did enjoy the poem very much; well-done! 🤗❤️❤️
Every Sunday when my kids are with me I make pancakes. Now I wonder if I should be writing a journal entry to ponder these things. LOL!
Hello author of the day! I’ve been reading Vocal+ to a friend as I’ve been embarking on and publishing Microfiction. A new genre for me. We both laughed out loud at the title and you certainly delivered! Hilarious! Pauline 🌸
I still eat my harthy pancakes breakfast meal once a month 🥰🥳Sorry you have to watch what you eat for health reasons, can relate
Lol, this was both so relatable and hilarious! I love your sense of humour!
"your bum-li-ness" 😁😂
Oh man! Now I want pancakes! On a side note, I truly apologize for not recognizing your name as "Novlet Allen" in Vocal+Assist. I am going through the Top Stories for April and May to find yours that I missed. Once again, my apologies!
Novel, you never cease to amaze me and bring a smile to my face! This was exactly how I needed to start today, reading your hilarity while I had my morning tea! 💜 Your candid and playful but blunt exploits are something that I always admire you having the courage to share! Thanks for being a beautiful but sadly pancake-less soul! 🥰🥞
🤣 I use to eat pancakes for dinner on occasion- you know, maple syrup and ice cream and all that. Now I try to 👨🏻🍳 cook! 😊✨
A moment on the lips can lead to a lifetime on the hips... But they do taste great! Thank you for this!