Overnight

Overnight

Just like that. All gone.

I didn’t hear her leave.

There was no creak in floor.

I swear I’d wake up if I’d heard the slightest move out of our broken door.

She didn’t leave anything behind?

How could there be no trace of someone who lived here?

Her smell was fused into the nuances of this home.

Not a thing left behind. I can barely recall the aroma I knew so well.

How could this be? Could she have really left without saying a word?

What could I have done to deserve such a cold gesture.

It hurt when she would ask of me the things I could, but then could never be bothered to offer.

No more than it hurt to see her lifeless around empty bottles.

Lifeless in alleys and sidewalks. She would yell nonsense and berate me.

She hurt me too.

But I never wanted her to leave. Not to take every trace of herself and leave me alone.

Id give her every bit of money I had now if I could.

Even if she buried it in her arm, or rammed it through her liver.

Even if I’d have to see her cold and shiver.

What's here now? Now that I’m alone?

How is this a place without her… how is it a home.

I hope she’s somewhere better, some place with shade and nicer weather.

Maybe near a charitable heart or a generous soul.

Somehow I feel like all these blue ghouls that haunt her absence are responsible.

With only their company I'll just feel awful.

My guilt incarnate.