Overcoming

The hold you've had on me is one I will never understand

This anxiety I feel is only instead my head and yet it has such power

I'm the one in control

So why can't I stop you

It's my own body, my own brain, and my own soul

But for some reason I can't stop

Am I addicted to the way the hurt feels?

Do the tears I cry fill the thirst of some demon greater than I

If not then why can't I make it stop

I look in the mirror and see myself but through the eyes of someone who isn't truly me

I see a reflection that I tell is beautiful, that I look at and chant that I'm worthy, that I will be ok

But you, my anxiety tricks me into thinking I'm lying to my own heart

That I am not beautiful, I am not worthy, I'll never be ok

Maybe one day I'll beat you

Or

You'll beat me