Not Your Shadow

You liked me best when I stayed behind you,

quiet as a coat on a chair,

laughing at your jokes

before I even got them.

﹁﹂

You called it “support.”

You called it “we’re a team.”

But somehow the team

Was always your name on the jersey.

﹁﹂

I learned the choreography:

nod here, soften there,

Shrink my opinions down

to bite-size, swallowable things.

﹁﹂

When I got loud

not angry, just honest

Your face would change

like I’d broken a rule

You never bothered to explain.

﹁﹂

So I practiced being a shadow.

Shadows don’t ask for clarity.

Shadows don’t need credit.

Shadows don’t leave.

﹁﹂

Until one day I saw myself

in a store window,

walking two steps behind you,

And I hated the shape I’d agreed to be.

﹁﹂

I went home and tried saying “no”

in the mirror

It came out shaky,

more breath than sound.

﹁﹂

But it was mine.

I stepped out of your outline,

into my own light,

and the world didn’t end

It just got quiet,

Like space finally opened up

to fit me.