No Roots

I have no where to go, no place to call home, I'm so tired of going down this road. I just don't know why people always put on a show, always hiding whats within, just so they can get within. They always get into my heart, my mind, my body and soul. This world is so cruel and cold. I wish I had somebody, anybody, to hold and to whisper in my ear and tell me there's more to me and inside of me. I want them to go on adventure to the depths of my heart and soul. I want them and they fight to bring it to the surface. I don't want them to turn away in so much dismay, I want them so desperately to stay but they wouldn't be able to believe it anyway. The things I keep buried tight in a little hole in my heart, inside of their home.

I long for something I never had, like a mom and a dad. So I go looking for it in other things, in different ways. Sometimes I cling to people thinking i'll find what my heart has been missing! A family, home, someone to call my own. Sometimes I take blade and slice into my flesh making gash, and I watch as the blood lands and splashes, all over the plastic I put down so it doesn't stain the carpet. How could I let this happen? How could i be so stupid. I told myself not to do it but I couldn't help it, its always calling my name like fanatic. I go up to the attic because i knew this was happen, no matter how hard I push against it, it always seems to get in and win. I always allow it in. I just can't let go, Its all I've ever known, this is what I consider home, I've been doing it since i was 10 years old, because I never felt whole.

I have no Roots, to hold me up, to guide and lead me, I had no Roots to guide me on this journey in life, my life has been filled but mental strife and battles. I've been on quest looking for a place to rest, A place to make a nest for the family I dream of building. Because i never came from a home, I've wandered this world alone, looking for it's meaning and my place in it. I'm own a mission to build my own forever home. A place so warm like a campfire in the moonlight. A region where I can raise a village that will one day rise up into a dynasty. I never had a home, so I'm on my own to create my Home, one that never folds, but stands up MIGHTY and strong, ready to go to war to beat all odds. Like a phoenix I emerge from the ashes on a mission more ready then ever before ready to build my FOREVER home.

I have no roots but then again my home was never on the ground but floating around inside me, waiting to be set free.