Night

I cannot count on my hands how many nights I have spent in the crevice of my room crying uncontrollably, and trying to bring reason to the things that happen in this life.

I do not understand the betrayal, or the deceitful state of mind that some live in, I do not understand the absolute disrespect, or the torment that subsides in the brains of the beautiful.

I do not understand death, or the grieving process, and I will never master the complete control over my emotions, because they eat me alive and I'm not sure how to counter

I am stuck in an ongoing war inside of myself and the contradictions are all-consuming and dismal

I have spent years searching for things to make me feel more alive, yet all fail to repair the wounds in my heart