Neural Storm

…it's like a network of fuzzy

energy stationed around my head—

an invisible halo of caged angst that

was never invited to be here.

yet, it remains.

i can't see it.

no one can.

but i feel it…

…it's like a low frequency ballad

of vibrating magnetism, thoughts

gridlocking before a maelstrom of

excited atoms recycles itself again—

never leaving, only strengthening

in intervals.

…it’s like my brain has turned into

a plasma ball where wandering

electrodes cloud the sense of being.

busy arms of branching filaments,

reach just beyond the edges of my

headspace, creating a faint haze that

follows me wherever I go.

…It’s like the synapses confuse and

misfire, disallowing a steady rhythm

of coherent syllables; the tongue would

rather sit idle than conversate with

fragmented speech.

…it’s like I tell my doctor these symptoms

only to be misdiagnosed with motion sickness,

advising two capsules every eight hours which

calm the storm but doesn’t extinguish it.

the forecast remains uncertain…

medical tests continue…

prescriptions get filled,

in hopes that one day

this electrostatic fog moves on,

giving way to mental clarity—

soon, before i forget who i used to be.