My pain runs deep

I remember being

on my knees praying

I seen the signs

But kept playing

Tell myself to pray

But I couldn’t accept the truth

So I question it all

why wouldn’t

I question u

if I was lying

that only means

I know the truth

So believe me when I say

I would have ate that fruit

Cause..

My minds been abused

And These words

have been miss herd

Fucked up and confused

Ive spent all this time

In my room

Trying to find

The real meaning

behind these words

I Choose to use

Now the sunny days fade

While cloudy days stay

Money caused pain

Since money is low

Its what I chase

But When I have it

I still feel broke

So I sabotage

our lines

before our rhymes

are even wrote

so I don’t know

a life with me

has to be

short and bleak

Because even

when I find someone

to put up with me

I still feel like

There’s something

Better awaiting me

And ultimately

I’ll end up alone

And that’s cold

But

this shit inside me

Hits different

why am I blinded

I feel the fire

burning inside

But slowly dying

I try to find a reason

to stay alive

As my brothers try

to help guide me

So I smile

but secretly I’m crying

Everyone’s left

and I don’t feel like trying

why fight?

Allergic to bullshit

As I watch the hands of time

I step off my path

&figure out

What’s my purpose now

As I sat on this couch

& Replayed those words

I’m proud of u

when u said it

It made a difference

I just wish I could have been

Something more

than these lines

I’ve written

So Before I hit the floor

& take my last breath

happily

I Think

Why’s this life so damaging

What’s the purpose of family

When all I’ve seen is tragedy

We live to die

I close my eyes

the last time

Just hoping I remember

What my mom looks like

My blue tune

Memories will fade

As the seasons do

I just hope

you never experience

The pain i do

So I don’t lie

today u reminisce

my existence

But when I was alive

you only created distance

love the ones u have

before it’s to late ....

We all make mistakes

But to forgive

is a test of

courage and faith

Either

walk away or stay

So....

I wrote this because

We all can relate

2 true heart ache