My Birthday To day

My Birthday To day

Today was my birthday 😭

I didn’t want it.

The candles flickered,

but I wished for silence instead.

The years stacked high,

a quiet tower I never asked to climb.

45, now that was a good age,

steady as a mid-morning sky,

not too young, not too old,

just right.

If only Birthdays went backward,

soft as a sigh,

I’d stop them there,

where time felt like a companion,

not a weight.

45, when mornings didn’t ache,

when the mirror spoke gently,

when the world still offered

a little more than it took.

I didn’t want today—

not the cards with their bright words,

not the cake too sweet to swallow.

I only wanted yesterday.

I wanted the day before that

somewhere in the middle,

where the years felt kinder.

Not today, where I am past my sell by date. 😭😳