'Milk and Honey' Review

Shopping at my local Walmart for some groceries and some household items, I came across a paperback copy of "milk and honey" by Rupi Kaur. Everyone has been raving about how great this book was and all that jazz. I was intrigued by why everyone loved it so much, that I wanted to check it out myself. I am a huge bookworm, and I have been trying not to buy a single book for a while since my "To Be Read" pile is never ending. When I decide to give in, I then end up buying at least two books. Yes, I know it's a problem, but hey I'm not addicted to drugs or alcohol, I'm addicted to reading and buying books. Completely different. Anyways, back to my story...

One reason I like to get some book at Walmart is that they're 40 percent of the Canadian price (score!) and then how can I say no?! So because I decided to buy "milk and honey," I found two other books that looked good and those were also 40 percent off (YEEESSSS). Considering I knew absolutely squat about this book, I bought it. Normally, I need to look at the cover, read the back, and then read the first couple pages or so to see if I like the author's writing style. This was probably the first time EVER that I impulsively bought a book because of all the positive reviews and friends telling me to read it. Without any hesitation, I opened to the first page.

The First Chapter: The Hurting.

This was a hard chapter for me to get through. Kaur went on to describe some serious shit. It was intense and powerful, because many people stray away from talking about such awful topics. If people were more open to talk about it than keep it hidden and "taboo" then I think so many others could heal from it like I did. Personally, I was emotional and I cried while reading this chapter as I have been through my own experiences of being raped by an old boyfriend and I never really told anyone until a couple years later after we had broken up. It's devastating to go through and feel like you're alone or people won't believe you. It sucks. I felt like I was reading my own diary in a way.

Kaur didn't hide the terrifying side of rape. It was so raw and honest. This are the kind of shit we need to talk about. Women and men. We are all humans and it can happen to anyone. If you've experienced any sort of sexual assault, this will hit you hard.

Chapter Two: The Loving.

This chapter was a complete flip of the past one. It was sweet, compelling, and may have made me a little horny. Kaur's descriptions flipped a switch in me and I was like "Damn.. Wow.. Oh..." I definitely wasn't expecting this at all, but it was a good kind of surprise.

She also went on to talk about some stupid stuff that couples argue about in their relationship. I found this refreshing. Sometimes it may sound dumb to talk about the weirdest or random stuff that you might argue with your partner about, but it was nice to know that it happens to other people too.

Chapter Three: The Breaking.

I struggled with this chapter a bit. It's about a relationship with a man that she was seeing, and how they are having a hard time. He only wants her for sex and if they're meant to be together they will, but right now they're not. She wants to be strong and that she doesn't need him, but then she goes on about how she'd take him back immediately and forget everything, all the bad stuff. This made me quite angry as so many people think this way, but if you were logical about it and not thinking emotionally you may realize it's a horrid idea and you're actually better off without this person. Sometimes it may not be the worst idea to get back together with an ex, but in my mind, I think that if you're not together anymore and it was for a good reason at the time, then maybe you're not meant to be together. Period. Let it go. Go find someone else that deserves you. I speak from personal experience on this, so it's not like I'm just saying this and I have no idea what it feels like.

Kaur also dwells on how she didn't realize sooner that she wasn't thinking logically and felt like an idiot. She was feeling bad for herself. I've been there too. You think to yourself, "Why did I waste so much time with that jerk?" or "Why have I felt so guilty for breaking up with them when I wasn't happy with them?" I've felt this way several times after breaking up with someone or just kicking them out of my life and honestly, I think it's an automatic response some people just have and they just have their epiphany later on to realize their truth. I believe that it can be OK to feel this way right after but hopefully you can overcome those feelings and move on.

The Fourth and Final Chapter: The Healing.

This spoke to me on a whole other level. One of the first lines I fell absolutely in love with was that he needed to leave for you to become yourself. How real is that? I don't think you can find yourself while being in a committed relationship. I think you need to be single and, do you. Truly this is the best way to find out who you are and explore.

Kaur writes, "You're your own soulmate." I couldn't say it better. Yes, it's great to share your life with someone else and enjoy it, but only you can make you happy. You need to find happiness within yourself. You need to love yourself. Without that, you're lost. Society makes us hate ourselves and we need to punch society in the throat and say, "Screw you, I love myself exactly the way I am."

You will heal eventually. No matter what comes your way, you will overcome it and heal. Just like a physical wound, you will heal over time. Not you might — no you WILL. There's no question about it. What a great way to end the book.

Concluding Thoughts:

It was a lot to take in while reading this work from Rupi Kaur, but I see why everyone praises it so high. Overall, it was very overwhelming and a powerful piece, but at the end of the day I enjoyed reading it. I don't regret buying it and reading it (although I have felt this way about other books). Happy reading all!