Poets in Motion
Poets in Motion

Marlboro Lights

#VocalNPM

Marlboro Lights

I left the movie tear-filled,

head down, watch your step

breathe in, breathe out

The sticky floor gripped onto my Vans

It’s a ghost town — not a single soul in sight

But someone is watching me

The fluorescent bulbs above sting

my eyes squint, trying to adjust to

the brightness

Everything’s so lit up in here; there’s nowhere to hide

My eyes look red + beaten

The first layer of makeup on my face has been washed away

I feel so vulnerable

Text to Mom:

I couldn’t handle it.

SEND

I left when I saw him hanging from the ceiling fan

Because part of me thinks that could’ve been you;

if things were different

The drinking. The pills. The rehab.

I keep seeing flashbacks in the bathroom mirror.

All of the times we picked you up

because the pills made you limp in your chair

All I could think about was you.

Crying on the subway home might be the most pathetic

People stare + talk to their friends

with looks of pity and confusion

they can all tell, you know

you face away from your best friend

so she doesn’t see the tears

sad poetry
Read next: I Am A Bullet.
Jeannie McDonald

writer, music lover, makeup enthusiast 

See all posts by Jeannie McDonald