Love and Hate

I've asked myself,

What's it like to be in love?

But then I remembered,

I had been in love before.

It wasn't what they said in the movies,

and the books.

It hurt.

When she could look me in the eyes,

and say,

I don't love you,

it hurt like hell.

Love isn't beautiful.

It is only beautiful,

once you get past the hurting,

the pain you have to go through for that person.

You have to give over

a huge piece of yourself.

Your soul

is bound to that person.

But no one tells you how much it can hurt.

When they don't love you back,

you don't get that piece of your soul back.

It withers away and dies slowly.

It doesn't die for a very long time.

It lingers around you,

and hangs over your shoulders,

reminding you that they never loved you,

the way you loved them.

They say

You can't love anyone until you love yourself,

But, oh God.

I loved her so much,

I forgot how much

I hated myself.