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Little Cottonwood

by Abram Kimball 26 days ago in surreal poetry
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An evening up-canyon

Last night, in a high canyon, I watched the sun set.

This mouth of the earth opened wide, jaws distended,

As though it wished to swallow the sky’s amber hues whole.

The void like conifer silhouettes on ridges

Looked all the world like the barbed obsidian teeth

of an ancient serpent’s twisted mandible, gaping.

And as that burning chariot lowered slowly

the serpent drank the autumn twilight afterglow,

And next fixed its eyes, that I was too small to see,

on the moon coming into its ravenous view.

It devoured them all

Body after body.

Again and again,

Evening unto evening

No belly ever full, no horizon picked clean

A lost descendant of that long gone god killer

An ouroboros of flora, fauna, and sky.

surreal poetry

About the author

Abram Kimball

Hi there! Thank you for visiting my profile. I hope it's becuase you like something I wrote. I am fairly new to this, so critique is welcomed.

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Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  3. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  1. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  2. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

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    Arguments were carefully researched and presented

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    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

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    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (18)

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  • Peter Majar6 days ago

    Wonderful prose brought me to your vision.

  • love your word choice here! enchanting

  • I know exactly where that is, and live two minutes from the canyon! Great poem, captured the canyon really well.

  • srinivasan16 days ago

    Your article is very nice and I wish you to continue writing like this.Please feel free to read my articles and share your comments. I kindly request you to follow me. https://vocal.media/poets/love-couples

  • Myles Pennock20 days ago

    Awesome! Check out mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Fiona Howell22 days ago

    Very vivid! I enjoyed it. :)

  • Joe Nasta22 days ago

    I love this poem!

  • Villa22 days ago

    your story very best please read my story & subscribe me https://vocal.media/journal/the-accounts-that-don-t-get-perused

  • Cheyenne Sage22 days ago

    Love your metaphors and descriptions, the snake was an excellent visual choice. Mysterious and cool. Check out some of my work too! I love description it’s one of my favorite parts haha. Keep writing you have something and you knoww ittt.

  • Thank you all for your kind comments! It has really encouraged me to put more of my work out there. I hope to share more soon!

  • Nice 👍❤️

  • Jason Basaraba24 days ago

    Absolutely wonderful. So descriptive.

  • This is lovely and makes me miss this canyon more than I already did.

  • Sean Bass25 days ago

    Beautiful, I don’t think I’ve ever come across ouroboros before, inspired choice

  • Dawn Salois26 days ago

    Excellent imagery!

  • Brittany Nelson26 days ago

    I can see a time-lapse reading this :) Awesome!

  • Cathy holmes26 days ago

    excellent imagery. Very well done. I absolutely love this.

  • This comment has been deleted

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