Killer snowflakes from the Alps

Killer snowflakes from the Alps

They floated through the sky last night,
And travelled with the wind,
I watched them falling past my light,
And knew something had grinned.

They looked like ordinary flakes,
So delicate and white,
But sparks were flying as they fell,
There was something wrong that night.

The warning came across the evening news,
They’re heading here, they said,
The killer snowflakes from the Alps,
Are coming overhead.

I laughed and pulled the curtains back,
What harm could snowflakes do,
Then one came tapping on the glass,
As though it wanted through.

It hit the window once again,
Then twenty more attacked,
They gathered round the window frame,
Until the glass had cracked.

I grabbed a hat and covered up,
Don’t let them touch your scalp,
For if they land upon your head,
They’ll savage your brain and scalp.

I thought that sounded bloody mad,
Until I heard a scream,
My neighbour ran across the snow,
Like something from a dream.

A snowflake landed on his head,
He danced around the street,
Then shouted that his garden shed,
One Was trying to eat his feet.

By midnight they were everywhere,
On rooftops, cars and trees,
One even tried to get inside,
By squeezing through the keys.

I hid beneath my winter quilt,
And waited there till dawn,
Then slowly looked outside again,
The killer flakes had gone.

The morning sun began to shine,
The snow was melting fast,
I thought the nightmare had all gone,
The danger now had passed.

Then something cold fell on my head,
I screamed and gave a yelp,
One killer snowflake winked at me,
And whispered, blame the Alps.