Judas

Soul, like silver coins , feels heavy before it is spent,

Bloodied moon came with a quiet agreement, a nodded consent.

Walking into the shadow, armored with a promise and some trust,

Watched as the sacred garden I had watered turned into dust.

Bringing out the brush, painting him in colors of the night,

The villany in how he fled from the warmth of the light,

Silenced with the kiss that came dipped in the blood of deceit,

Self inflicted, laying all that made him royal at their feet.

Carried the anger, pointed to the blame to remain sane

Villain and hero in a story, branded forever a terrible name.

Swearing I could never consume such a cost,

Measure in coins, different parts of me, till I feel lost

But memory twists like a corkscrew, champagne bottle in the dark,

Leaving a scar, covered by a void , quite a devastating mark.

Dishes with the taste of a promise unseasoned, still frozen

Weight of bitter words but I rather have it this way, unspoken.

Looking for the monster, the thief that stole away my night,

To hold up his sins, air them out to the judgment of light

But the glass shows a familiar face, one that I cannot deny

The kiss was self inflicted, betrayed my values. The Judas was I.

How I feel, alone cause everyone leaves before the real me arrives

Tip of my tongue, sweet, overflowing with lies

I tend to chase people away, some still don't read the signs

I wouldn't hang myself though , I know there is a Peter somewhere inside.