It Feels Like...

Raging winds, rain, cupped in moist, cool air, and dark clouds,

swirling, between the neural paths, filled with debris and obstacles, amidst

the bad weather in my brain.

Unable to keep it contained.

Or sometimes, maintained... like...

I'm wearing a raincoat, with umbrella, for a hurricane.

An earth quake, and a small bridge, riddled, with cracks, holes, and a huge

gap... over a deep ridge.

A bubbling lava, and indigestion, in the belly of a volcano.

It's fucked. Feeling good... then feeling like, I'm about to erupt.

Brain, cracked. Physically drained.

Yet, beautifully mapped.

But, then again, like a PC, after browsing porn... under attack.

I'm in pain!

Always frustrated by my mind's sensitivity and strain.

Struggling, at times, to maintain, tranquility; often in vain.

Be it from bad relationships, bad circumstances, bad decisions, bad people,

bad vibes, bad sex, or bad stress. Fuck! Bad jobs, bad odds, bad

dreams...

it's just me... trying not to scream.

Paying bills, paying dues, paying the mortgage, paying the rent.

Paying the dentist, paying the student loan...

paying the price, paying for the house, paying for life.

Pleasing my mom, pleasing the family, pleasing a husband, pleasing a wife.

Pleasing my man, pleasing my woman, pleasing the boss... pleasing society.

Fuck it! Pleasing the world! Pleasing the masses!

Fucking myself!

Tilting the glasses.

Fuck my health!

Fuck the wealth!

In and out of hospital beds.

Constantly on meds.

One for pain, one for strain... this one's administered through the veins.

Feeling nothing... feeling drained.

Feel like shit, now...

I'm not well.

And the rest of the world?

On drugs... feeling swell!

©I.M😌💬 me…💞xo