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it cannot be fear

the art of running from it

By Leigh Victoria Phan, MS, MFAPublished 8 months ago • 1 min read
Runner-Up in Instructions for a Feeling Challenge
Illustration Courtesy of Okalinichenko on Adobe Stock

when your heart constricts,

turn from it.

think of something else

and run away.

we're not allowed

to feel that here,

inside cubicle walls

.

when you break out in a sweat,

wash your face.

dry your skin.

baptize yourself

in a cheap vanilla cloud.

just body spray from rite aid.

and pretend

...

if no one in the office noticed,

it didn't happen.

(right?)

...

when your stomach hollows out,

and memory silences your thoughts,

and you miss a few words

from the person in your ear...

"I'm so sorry, our connection

got a little staticy.

Could you repeat that?"

...

never reveal the truth

if it betrays your weakness

...

when you walk out of the building,

punch the digits representing your existence,

into the timeclock.

ignore the emptiness

clawing out of your back.

walk a little faster

so it can't tear you apart

...

you're just tired

(right?)

...

the sky went dark

you never saw the sun today

if you don't call the beast

inside your mind

by its name

it can't take you down

(right?)

Free VerseStream of Consciousness

About the Creator

Leigh Victoria Phan, MS, MFA

Writer, bookworm, sci-fi space cadet, and coffee+tea fanatic living in Brooklyn. I have an MS in Integrated Design & Media and an MFA in Fiction from NYU. I share poetry on Instagram as @SleeplessAuthoress.

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    Written by Leigh Victoria Phan, MS, MFA