Is It Working?

It's just been a little too much tonight.

What a juxtaposition, to be alive at this time, more so,

to be a human, amongst these other humans, who may

or may not, know that we are hurtling towards something

awful. ASMR just won't do it tonight.

I'm not sure what to do right now, isn't this self care?

Won't it get better if I drink some water? A whole bottle,

as I listen to someone escape reality, a guided instruction

to follow along- shouldn't it be working?

I have mouthed Neruda poems like psalms in the witching hour,

I'm doing everything I know to be feasible self-care, at 3 a.m.,

what they told me would work, what I want to work, I am-

I'm tired, but my failures forbid sleep.

I can't believe I was surrounded by soft pinks and tiny shoes,

bitten into cool strawberries and was the only one to note, oh,

the weather isn't right. It's getting worse, see?

Well, the devastation of climate change isn't baby shower talk,

and I'd agree, if the delusion of a rose-tinted future didn't inspire

an overwhelming urge to scream in horror.

I think this is helping. Unprecedented times call for unconventional-

I don't know if writing poems is self-care, or holistic, but it could be worse.

I could still be doom scrolling Twitter, its dumpster fire quote tweets-

instead I'll burden you with bad poetry.