Intrusive Thoughts

Intrusive Thoughts

I have been thinking of wading out into water

Going further than just knee deep

Sinking into the deep end

And falling into cold watery sleep

I have been thinking about sharp cold steel

The kind with the cutting edge

Or crisp cool air on a tall building

And the view from over the ledge

I have been thinking of chalky white pills

The ones with the bitter taste

Chased down with some sort of 100 proof

So the buzz doesn't go to waste

I have been thinking about bad drugs

The kind you put into your veins

That if you take too much at one time

It may be a permanent end to the pain

I have been thinking of actually living

Let the chaos take me nice and slow

To live a life and tell some tales

I'm sure that must be the best way to go

I am thinking of a blessed recovery

A mind that's free and clear

A victorious win over the darkness

Because I am still here

I am seeing the path that's before me

The one that looks so scary and hard

But that is the journey of living

And today is a good day to start.