In the Shadow of Chance

Elongate the flow of gambling, the

Celestial privilege of unknown forces,

Lamenting, feigning indecency, spaced out,

Impeccable blank faces, no blinking, desire soars,

Pushing for more to win, to become a star, but oh,

Senseless deceit, loss, incompleteness, failure,

Eclipsed by the absolute winner.

***

Author's note: I grew up being cautioned against the seductive nature of gambling, as many people in my family somehow fell into disappointment and depression due to such games of fate. Even entrepreneurship seemed like gambling to my parents and grandparents because nobody ever managed to have a business and grow in our family. It was always this eclipsed nature of a limited belief that money needs to be worked hard for, and usually when sweating hard for others. There is a certain emptiness and lack of fulfillment no matter the win or loss, the deep decline of the mind while wanting for more always, the fear of losing a future possible win that always becomes illusory. I want to break this pattern and grow not by gambling, but by obscuring and releasing our intergenerational pattern of being stuck in reverse. I want to grow through my own creations, eclipsing all the feelings of limitations sown in my being.