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In the Illusion's Arms

by Jillian Spiridon 10 days ago in surreal poetry

Her inner struggle knows no bounds.

In the Illusion's Arms
Photo by Eutah Mizushima on Unsplash

The first wave of illusion is always the worst,

right when it picks me up and cradles me

in its ever-provoking tide of whimsy

that nonetheless bears dread.

I remember getting lost, once,

caught under the realm of one

that bled into others, building.

Each apparition gave its greeting,

smiles like the blades of scythes,

and I knew I was trapped in my senses.

By Frida Aguilar Estrada on Unsplash

The talks and the pills didn't work

as they tried to drag me out of a time

where I was thriving in ways unknown

even as my exterior began to crumble.

I thought I knew better, "never again,"

but as soon as you flush the tablets

down the porcelain toilet bowl

it's only a matter of time before

the cracks begin to reappear.

By HalGatewood.com on Unsplash

The illusions began again in earnest,

each one more troubling than the last,

and soon I found myself in straits

where I walked barefoot in the rain.

Someone tried to help me, but by then

I didn't know friend from enemy,

and the little white room I'd left

welcomed me back with open arms.

The nurses were nice, if a tad smiley,

but I wondered where I'd been

since I never felt so alive as then.

By Daan Stevens on Unsplash

"Hello" and "goodbye" meant little,

as patients shifted in and out,

but I tried to keep my guard up

while therapy tried to rework me.

I wouldn't have it, I was done,

I had had enough of white coats...

but my mother's phone call told me

that she was worried, that she knew

how I struggled and struggled without end.

"Please" was the word that cut me.

And so I battled my illusions

even as they assailed me,

and my senses began to clear

as if there'd never been a problem.

But this time I knew better (I told myself)

because illusions were my secret

that was best not shared at all.

By Kristina Flour on Unsplash

Did you enjoy this poem? If so, please leave a heart! There are other poems (and more) over on my profile page here. You can also find me on Twitter if you'd like to chat about writing, craft, or just Vocal in general. Thanks for the support!

surreal poetry
Jillian Spiridon
Jillian Spiridon
Read next: Poem: New Life
Jillian Spiridon

just another writer with too many cats

twitter: @jillianspiridon

email: [email protected]

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