If Only She Knew

Both lying there in the silence, my head resting on her chest I can feel the beat, the constant unchanging rhythm. As I run my fingers down her arm I can feel her pain and her brokenness. There on her skin like keys on a piano, they all play a different note, those notes are the melody of her heart. The heartbeat is constant, the song in her heart is not, it’s a broken record, scratched and worn, skipping and fading out. I can feel every dark note, every unseen tear, unheard scream, and unnoticed pain. She tenses up, afraid that seeing her scars will make me run like the others have, she fears people and hides the person she has become. She smiles and laughs but it’s fake, just there to fool you from the true pain and brokenness she keeps within. Breath deepens and heart beats faster, her fear is taking over, but I won’t let it. I pull her closer and lay my arm across her chest and I feel the breathing slow and her heartbeat becomes calm. If only she knew that I wasn’t going to run to like the others, her song might be scratched and worn out, it skips notes and plays off tune but that’s okay I love her, missing lyrics and all. If only she knew that beneath my sleeves, my skin played the notes for my broken melody too.