idk

I don't know what the fuck I'm feeling.

I know I feel rays of sunshine

as they soak into soft skin.

I know I feel hope flutter

in every gust of wind.

I know I feel afraid

when the world is unlit

and imagination creates beasts

in the infinite dark.

I know I feel joy

like electricity pulsing

from heart to fingertips

when my mind is blank

and my hands make

intuitive brushstrokes on blank canvases.

I know I feel awe

when I stand atop a cliff

and stare down

watching trees sway

and a stray leaf tumble by.

I know I feel pain

such utter agony

at the thought of others in pain

and being unable to intervene.

I know I feel devastation

seeing trash on the sides of highways

and absolute grief

when a stray pet's body

lies among it on the side of the road.

I know I feel nothing but love,

adoration, respect, surprise,

excitement, anxiety,

when I think about my role as a mother.

I know I feel

and

I know that I know nothing

yet

I know enough

at least I hope.

Sometimes though

I still don't even know what the fuck I'm feeling.