I Miss You

I miss you.

On the days when something happens,

And I need a chat on the phone,

I miss you.

*

When I achieve greatness,

And you don't mind if I boast,

I miss you.

*

When I get stressed,

and I need to vent,

I miss you.

*

When the days lengthen into Summer.

I see you.

*

When the stars shine, In the quiet of the night

I feel you.

*

When the grandchildren play,

And they look a certain way,

I see you.

*

When you visit in my dreams,

I see you.

*

Although I do see you,

I still miss you.

***

I wrote this because I wanted to try to write a non-religious poem for a funeral. Poems for funerals are sought after, and it's hard to write one when we are deep in the pangs of grief. I didn't write anything for my grandparents' funerals, maybe because the grief was so fresh.

My grandparents are still in my dreams. I dreamt of my grandpop with long hair (something he would never entertain!), and I got to cut it for him. It was lovely. My Nan is usually in the background in my dreams, which is typical of her. She was never one for the limelight.

Even my Dad is in my dreams. I dreamt he was living in a caravan with his other family - very much alive, although not well. It was a frustrating dream because I couldn't get near him. Other people kept getting in the way.

Everyone has different beliefs about death, but I love to see the dreams where they turn up. Even if my brain remembers them and puts my emotions into pictures, I am still grateful for the things that remind me of all the people I love.