I’m Not Rapaport

Are you Neptune or Poseidon?

Am I Diane or Diana?

Are you Super Boy or Superman?

Are you afraid of Cops in this great land?

I certainly am.

Are you my father and my dad?

Do you believe in Santa Claus,

Or do you worship Old Saint Nick?

Do you have ink like me,

Old Man from the sea?

Can you set fires with your mind?

Can you dance and sing until day turns to night?

Do you shine bright like a diamond?

Now that I am grown with children,

Am I still your little girl?

May I now call you, Dad OG,

Archangel Michael Rapaport?

Did you name me Michelle?

May I now call you dad,

Now that I proved via science and faith

that I am your daughter,

Oh monotheistic God of Earth,

Charles Atlas?

Do you actually love me, Daddy,

Or have you forsaken me,

Because I am not Rappaport,

But I am the human Michelle drop.

Boom goes the microphone

As it hits the floor, Dad!