Housewife, 34 - A Life in Full Colour

I am a rainbow

and I will not dull my tones

to fit into your

monochromatic worldview.

I live my life in full, bold colour.

I am the night sky

with deep calming indigo

and bright flashes of

iridescent light as the

twinkling stars change colour before your eyes.

I am a garden,

verdant, lush, and full of life.

Vibrant fauna and flora,

Dahlias, Sweet Peas, Gladioli!

Flourishing greens with bright fruit and ripe veg.

I'm stormy oceans,

lighting and ominous skies.

Surreal, nightmarish creatures

hide in tumultuous grey,

waiting to feast on ships torn asunder.

I am a Spring day.

Insects floating lazily

over meadows of

pastel wildflowers whose scent

thickens the air with heady perfumes.

I'm a blazing fire

with infinite tongues of red

and sharp, orange teeth

that hungrily gnaw and nip

with an all-consuming passion or rage.

I'm a factory.

Industriousness and concreate

held together with

muddied colours of grimy filth

and a jet black void of bleak drudgery.

I'm a hidden stream

tucked away under the trees,

just babbling gently.

A secret chartreuse jewel

with warm memories of familial love.

I'm a cathedral,

a monument forged from love.

An intricate prayer

of hope, faith, joy and glory.

A kaleidoscope of exaltation.

I am a vast lake,

my cobalt surface tranquil

and still, so that the

solitude of nature is

reflected with mirror-like perfection.

I'm the sprawling moors,

sepia heights with daring drops.

Where penny-brown sheep

With small white woolly faces

live free amongst rich heather and gold gorse.

I am history.

Stunning architecture built

with broad red sandstone.

like sun-kissed rust and garnets,

glinting stained-glass lovingly crafted.

I'm a cavern of

unfathomable systems

tunnelled through the slate,

interrupted by pools of

water, ethereal silver and pewter.

I am the mountains,

a lonely, pink dawn over

gargantuan cliffs that

crown dense emerald forests,

home to fae, witches, and magical beasts.

I am a palette

filled with ever-changing paints.

Constantly mixing,

blending every shade and hue

to paint the canvas of a life well-lived.

The Inspiration

When I first started writing this poem the only thing I knew for certain was that it would be my entry for the 'Color is Pride: True Colors' competition.

As an Asexual, it would have been easy for me to talk about LGBTQA+ Pride but I needed a passionate pride, something deeply personal and filled with the fond memories that make up the essence of my unique personality. As an artist, I live for colours and couldn't possibly limit my multi-faceted character to a handful of hues. Instead, I chose to add limitation challenges through poetic style and metrics.

This is something I've never attempted before, which is why I'm eager to talk about it. Though the rules were not strict, I wanted to try a modified version of a Tanka style. The Tanka is a type of Japanese Quintain poetry consisting of a 31 syllables over 5 lines arranged like a Haiku. I added more syllables in the fifth line, so that my total syllables were arranged as 5-7-5-7-10. This gave me a pattern totalling 34 syllables to adhere to.

I began crafting my stanzas to paint a picture of my personality using the colours of nature. I was halfway through when I realised a lot of my happiest memories were formed in the beautiful countryside where I live and that the vivid scenes I was painting resonated with Cumbrian life in general as well as many other places in rural England.

I looked at photos to inspire my 15 stanzas and it was then that my poem found true depth. I am a canvas, coloured with the paint of my glorious environment and like many others, I am proud and extremely grateful to live in Cumbria.

The title is a play of the famous letters from 'Housewife, 49', most recently portrayed in 2006 by the late, great Victoria Wood. The BBC television drama is based on real WW2 diary entries from Nellie Last, a housewife from Barrow-in-Furness, Cumbria. Though I'm unmarried, I'm a SAHM who was born and bred in the small, industrial town, so it made sense to base my title on this. I feel this also speaks volumes about certain aspects of my personality.

When the aforementioned film was released, it had a dark, gritty filter over all of the town scenery to make it seem more dull and imposing. This of course was part of the story's aesthetic, but my town and the surrounding areas are often portrayed as depressingly dingy and claustrophobically industrial. I wanted to share the beauty that moulded me with the rest of the world and weave it full of intimate memories that can be appreciated by all proud Cumbrians.

Now completed, I look at my poem and it’s no longer about the competition - it’s about the several layers of pride forged together to create an ode to the spirit of Cumbria.

Pride in myself, my depth of character, collection of knowledge and wealth of experiences I’ve encountered in my 34 years of living.

Pride in the dedication and discipline needed to spend several hours counting syllables and finding the perfect words to craft to immortalise precious childhood memories. Each line holds so much meaning hidden beneath the surface and each word carefully selected and placed to tell a story and express a piece of my soul.

I’m proud of my heritage and the rich, natural beauty of my home but most of all I am proud that I could craft a multi-dimensional homage to share the vibrant colours of my life with the world.