It's not lost it's simply seeking you out to be found. Remember you must not go looking for you will not find it on the ground.
They can't guess how you suppress, allow your authentic self to be. They will be there when you need them; it's just in that moment you cannot see.
Trust yourself, talk to your demons and let them be heard. Once you have forgiven yourself for your wrongs - do not think it's absurd.
Believe in yourself; love yourself and you will always cope. Remember you will always begin again that is why we call it hope.
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