Guided Meditation for the Restless

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Welcome to our guided meditation.

You will mindfully focus through your entire body, starting from the feet, traveling upwards. Let’s start.

***

Sit in a comfortable position.

Now close your eyes.

Take a deep, mindful breath.

Become aware of your feet.

Big feet.

Your feet are ugly. Especially the toes.

It’s like you were cursed.

Wonder what curse someone must have to have such ugly toes.

Come back to the present moment.

Inhale. Ugly toes. Exhale.

. . .

Now focus on your knees. Close your eyes, visualize how your knees feel.

Enter the zone of transcendental contemplation.

Focus on your left knee.

That’s the knee you hit falling off a bicycle when you were 7.

You did tell your brother you haven’t learned to ride properly yet.

Now that knee has a mark.

You tell everyone it’s a birthmark.

At least they don’t look as ugly as your toes.

Inhale deeply. Exhale.

. . .

As you breathe nice and slow, move upwards to your abdomen.

Feel the insides.

What’s that rumbling sound?

You knew pasta’s not good for you.

Wait, did you turn the stove off after cooking?

You definitely did.

But what if you didn’t?

You always forget things.

But forgetful people are smarter. I saw a thing about that. On YouTube.

. . .

Follow your breath. And move up your chest.

Visualize air being circulated throughout your lungs.

It’s amazing how your lungs take air in and out.

All day. Without you focusing on it.

Except at times like meditating.

You can stop breathing, and just die.

Brush that thought off, you’re suffocating.

. . .

Your lungs are inside your body, and it gets unnoticed.

It does its thing automatically. What a gift.

Unlike your toe. That thing is still ugly.

Inhale deeply. Exhale. Think gratitude.

. . .

Channel all your focus on your face.

Focus on your lips.

I did not tell you to smack it.

Move up, focus on your nostrils.

Feel the air traveling in and out.

But your nostrils make a whistle sound everytime.

Is that normal?

Notice the whistle.

Use noise to concentrate.

Your nostril-whistling is fine.

But it’s getting irritating.

Imagine if you had to hear them whistle all day.

But now that you know it exists, what if you really hear it all day?

. . .

Life is so frustrating.

Oops, keep breathing.

Inhale, and exhale slowly. Inhale again.

You have to do it everyday till the rest of your life.

Stop breathing and you’ll die.

We are done. With the meditation.

You are done. I’m not talking about the meditation.

Open your eyes.

But don’t rush away. Keep breathing slowly.

. . .

Thank you for being with us. We hope the journey was transformative.

Namaste.