Growing Pains

There is a rattling

In my chest

Like a heart

That is

trying to beat

But instead

Is being beaten.

There is a

Rattling

In my chest-

There is a

Rattling

Like a

hollow belly

full

Of dead

Butterflies

As if they were

placed there

To remind me

Remind me that-

They were placed

In an empty

Tombstone

As if their presence

Would be

Enough,

As if they could

Peel my skin

From my

Bones

And make

My belly grow.

Please...

Don't make me.

I

Am full grown.

You...

Were placed there

To remind me?

I

Remember.

I remember

The lullaby from

Your wings.

Please eat.

Please eat.

Please.

I remember

The tummy aches

The sour throat.

I remember...

Her.

How she replaced

My name with

Pale skin,

With shallow bones

And homeless

Eyes.

I remember

You

Thief

Draining

The hunger

Clotting

In my blood.

I promise

I will

Throw up

Throw up

Throw up the

Golden butterfly

Apologies.

I will forget how

To cry

How to bleed

How to swallow.

But I will

Always remember

What it feels like

To have

Growing pains.