Ground Zero (Life With ADHD)

Faces

Voices

Surrounded but spacing out

Dreaming of my own space

A place where there's a place for each

Where no one can't be reached

"Are you listening?!"

"Oh, sorry I spaced out a little..."

"Is it that hard to pay attention?!"

They're speaking gibberish...

Everyone's on the same page but me-

When really, we're just reading different books

In the same world, but with different outlooks

"No I just..."

"You're being disrespectful."

"No I'm just..."

Do I have to be sorry at times I'm lost?

I'm insensitive?

Make it make sense

I hate being misunderstood

"Helloooo, c'mon get with the program!"

"You can't remember anything, can you?"

I know I'm not stupid-

But sometimes I can't truly convince myself

"You just need more discipline!"

"Is that what you think?"

I'm not lazy-

But I always have to prove it

As if they refuse to see any good in me

I'd rather they just not at all notice me

"Why can't you sit still?"

"Sorry, I'm uncomfortable."

"We'll it's bothering me..."

The problem's always me

The ignorance never ceases to amaze me

They're all their own reason-

Why I keep these walls around me

With nothing beside me but my brutal honesty

There's no more apologies coming from me

"Sometimes it's hard to stand you..."

"Then stop trying to. No one's forcing you."

Because they only see the bad in me

I cant stand how they misunderstand me

The lot of them just want to take a shot at me

The absence of any accuracy is saddening

They can see, but never notice me

They're the ugliness I see in me-

Who gave birth to my imaginary enemy

And made me hate the mirror

So, let me reflect to them what is says to me

"I'm being mean??"

She must not own a mirror-

So she screams into the one I hold in front of her

"I'm inconsiderate??"

"Last week you asked if I were illiterate..."

Inconsiderate- He thinks that isn't

Maybe he doesn't know any different

His confusion is almost innocent-

But this isn't bliss- I'm fresh out of forgiveness

"What if I asked if your ignorance is deliberate?"

I know it isn't it

Why do I give them the benefit of the doubt when their doubt gave me no benefit

Where's the end of it?

My tolerance has reached its limit

I'm not one with boundless grace

But, I have guilty pleasure in feeding them their own medicine

I'm no better than them

But I was never trying to be-

"Can you at least try to understand me?"

I'm the bar constantly out of reach

Trying to-

Escape the sea of voices below me

The maze of glares I cannot navigate

The road of judgment I somehow always find myself traveling

Within these walls of misunderstanding

Where I'm standing, this is Ground Zero

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FOR CONTEXT, there's conversation taking place within the writing; the words within quotation marks ("") that are bold are from the perspective outside of ADHD, the words within quotation marks that are bold and italicized are from the perspective inside ADHD.