grimy books and filthy dvds

sticky covers and dog-eared pages, I wonder how many nasty hands touched this thing before me, this borrowed tome, this library loan, like, what even is this stain? I don’t like that it looks sorta orange like Cheeto dust, or look here, this brown spot, maybe it’s barbecue sauce? and these random off-color splotches of grease —  okay, I just gotta read a little more, get a little deeper to the unsullied pages at the center, where the plot gets thicker, the pages get cleaner — after all, most punks who start books don’t really finish them, these grimy books, ughhh and ickkk, these fucking pages are making me sick… I can’t think too much about it, okay it’s nice when you get a sort of new-ish hardcover, but the soft covers, forget it —  it’s nacho city, tattered and shitty… but what can I say, I’m broke now and I’ve already spent like half my life’s earned income at Barnes & Noble —  can’t be doing that shit no more… and these lovely library books, THEY ARE FREE, my thirst for literature must be quenched somehow —  so I revel in these dirty, disgusting, filthy but amazing books — shared amongst the unwashed masses, the anonymously literate collective of this weird little city where I find myself living right now…. thank god! thank god for The Library, that’s right, that’s a lower case ‘g’ and an upper case ‘L’, hallelujah for Free Media! who needs a streaming platform that won’t even let you share passwords when you have anything you want on unlimited inter-library loan! OK maybe some of this shit is a little lower-definition because it’s like old format, you know — DVDs don’t look so great no more on HD TVs, but come on, the director’s commentaries alone make up for it, don’t they? don’t they???? ha, yeah, well here’s my card, lady —  I know I got like ten things checked out already and like half of them are past due, and yes, I’m checking out more, but you guys got rid of late fees, not me … what is this, Blockbuster back in 2003? that shit is music to my ears… do I want a brand new bookmark with that? hellll yesss I do! lay it on me, please, oh library lady, lay it on me… Notes: So I am in the library right now—it’s actually my new library, because I recently moved. And I was sifting through my poetry archives and figured I might as well talk about this one, because, duh, it relates to the library. I wrote this poem at a time in my life when I was kind of broke, so I was doing a lot of borrowing. Because empty pockets shouldn’t stop a guy from being literate, right? Anyway, I was totally maxing out my library card at the time. I was borrowing all sorts of stuff. Novels, DVDs, Blu-rays, audiobooks, short story collections—you name it. Libraries even have video games and board games. Did you know that? I mean of course you did, because you’re a big ole bookworm just like me. And you probably go to the library every weekend—because, why not? So, yeah, at this new library I’m in right now, I discovered they have all sorts of random equipment you can borrow, like telescopes and fishing rods, TV antennas, pickleball paddles, and even a fucking KitchenAid stand mixer. Pretty crazy shit! The only downside to getting to use all this free stuff is that a whole bunch of other randos also use it. Yeah, I try not to think too much about that part. Especially when you think about all the grubby, disgusting fingers that probably touched the book you’re holding right now. And where they took it. And what horrific sights that book probably witnessed in the private homes of all these strangers. I remember this one copy I got of Post Office was so fucking disgusting. It had all sorts of yellow and brown stains on various pages. Dog ears, tattered pages, tears, ripped book jacket. And the sad thing is, I actually do own my own copy of Post Office. But I needed to pull some quotes from it and I was too lazy to dig through the apartment to find it. The DVDs and Blu-rays usually skip and stutter because they have thumb prints all over them. I got this one copy of Shrek 2 (don’t ask why). And I was just thankful I didn’t own a microscope, because who knows what sorts of living things were probably colonizing the surface of it. All kidding aside, the library is a wonderful place. It’s a great way to discover new genres. Maybe stuff you’re not sure you want to take a chance on buying with your own money. Plus, it’s good just to get out of the house or your tiny apartment and mix it up with the local readers in town. The library is full of readers who are just like you. Human beings seeking quiet spaces. People seeking adventure in pages. People who come together to share thoughts, ideas, and yeah, the occasional cyanobacteria. Good thing we all have plenty of disinfecting wipes lying around.