Grandma Has Won Free Transport To Aldi

Grandma Has Won Free Transport To Aldi

Grandma won a competition,
she nearly dropped her tea,
“Free transport down to Aldi!”
“Well, that’ll do for me.”

She waited by the doorstep,
with shopping bags in hand,
expecting some posh taxi,
or maybe something grand.

A broomstick landed outside,
with a helmet on the seat,
Grandma stared and shouted,
“You’re having me on, sweet!”

She climbed aboard the broomstick,
her bloomers tucked in tight,
then shot across the rooftops,
and frightened every kite.

She flew above the traffic,
and waved at number nine,
“Get out my way, I’m shopping,
that middle aisle is mine!”

She landed hard at Aldi,
right next to trolley bay,
knocked over three promotions,
then calmly walked away.

She bought some bread and biscuits,
a drill, a lamp, a chair,
a garden gnome, two slippers,
and things she’d never wear.

The broomstick started groaning,
“You’ve bought far too much there!”
Grandma strapped the shopping on,
and said, “You’ll have to bear!”

She flew back home much slower,
with sausages round her neck,
a cabbage hit the postman,
her eggs were nearly wrecked.

But Grandma loved her broomstick,
“Best transport I have found,
no buses and no waiting,
it’s a great way to get around!”

Now every trip to Aldi,
she shoots off through the sky,
with shopping bags behind her,
and bloomers flying high!