Sitting on the floor
Afraid to live
I feel a knot in my throat
I can't hold back anymore
I take a deep breath and a tear streams down my left cheek
With my legs crossed I hunch over
My mind wanders into panic
The worst things happen in my head
I probably kill myself five times a day
I try to make them stop
but they don't leave me alone
Even when they're not present, they linger
"you hurt him"
"they're going to die"
"you're a bad person"
That's how it always is
Obsessing over what will happen,
what I did, what I didn't do
"Did I do that?"
Replaying my day over and over
to make sure everyone is safe
"are they safe?"
"am I safe?”
About the Creator
Esme Alvarez
I started writing as a way of getting things off my chest or head. It makes me feel a little less crazy. To those that are living in fear due to mental illness: you are strong, you are a warrior and you are not alone.
Enjoyed the story? Support the Creator.
Subscribe for free to receive all their stories in your feed.
Comments
There are no comments for this story
Be the first to respond and start the conversation.