Desert Rose

when. I am. Alive.

this is something more than I expected, to know myself on the other side of intrusiveness and lost thinking, maybe a third eye view, if you will. I wanted it to happen smoother, with more grace than all the things I thought came before. But that's not how great change in the heart and mind of the individual occurs. blank birds in the night tweet their sings and flit their plight. it cant be bothered to be more.

when. i am. Dying.

my figure head feelings merge tightly to the ceilings and tell all they would to wood begotten seedlings. I know you want to know what this is, this loving of death embrace beyond the throes of your un-remitted grace. I want her to see my face beyond what is recognizable. I say how it is that the this is the that and the thereafter is where-after its knowingness is at. but only the hearing of pain and feeling of defiant suffering is she able to manifest. Though not in jest. it is best. i end this chapter with some rest...

After. i am. alive.

Going back, to being young. its all we've got to give to be our only 1 true self. I sit in this mired life and exhibit only two colors; Black & White. they wrap in their respective light. it filters out all who might, want to see me down or out of the introspective space i hold so close to myself. its blinding more than what we once thought. these days it takes up all of our minds. no more colors will i see now. blind to all the extraneous knowings am i.

After. i am. dead.

it makes more sense to all of who see the spectacle from the inside first, then from the outside last. it needs both to be sure. but what if we could see them both at the same time? what would happen to our sense of things? would it change into something more. something beyond what we had seen as yet? before? there will be some clattering art and and noise when I finally depart. but not so much that the seeing of the living can walk into the nether.

When. We are. Living.

Our Fated Strength Surprised, and Smelted Together with Each Others Eyes. I know it not in these days but we will find somehow, some-ways To Defend ourself from this perfect haze. we are very brokin in the interior Or We are fucntioning off balance, and slighty off kilter it maked us Look Trembling From Fear of What There Is To Fear We Clutch Tightly To All We Hold So Very Dear.

When. We are. Dying.

its our end to be sure and sad we say to share our deepest thoughts and give to them this sway. but not in our deepest hour can we ask this of ourselves. we would only forever be seeing that which we thought was real, but wasn't. only very wasn't forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and Never.