Dear you

Dear you,

I remember twice a month we'd think of each other,

And it'd be nice for a change to simply smile.

No matter how far down into myself I was burrowed,

My smile would come for you.

It was nice.

But I think I forgot that pressed flowers don't last forever.

And the fact that we didn't...we didn't think to catch the eyes of one another

In order to breathe together,

To be together...

I let the petals fall to the ground and I sit, just as broken as they are..

Pretty; in their preserved, musty fragrance, I am reminded of the thoughts that passed my mind in sole darkness.

None of peace or quiet

Only the wishing, aching, craving of a way to somehow smile...

Burrowed again, too deep and out of reach.

I could only rhythmically knit

Without you, I return to following the tightened puppet strings and it is...

Enough, enough, enough of this.

I mourn the peace and quiet of before the seeded pains.

When fertiliser was simply my own breathing without any need

For an echoed symphony following me.

I don't need double the footsteps,

A leader in the dances of life.

I must see the comfort in my own rugged-up skin,

And learn to balance the leading and the following of the world.

~