Dear Sweet Baby

Dear sweet baby,

I know why you did it.

I understand the pain that weighs so heavily on your mental that it becomes physically unbearable.

I can fathom the feelings felt daily that nothing even matters.

I, myself, feel the pressures of the world crushing what’s left of my delicate spirit and wondering what is it that I’m really fighting for.

Dear sweet baby,

I don’t blame you for leaving us.

Even though it was “too soon” for us to want to deal with such a loss, you had lost your fight to keep going.

I hate that you’re no longer physically in my tomorrows, but I understand.

Dear sweet baby,

Forgive me for not being there more.

Forgive me for not reaching out more.

Forgive me for not coming to Cali to visit you.

God honestly knows I wanted to but I foolishly let life get in my way and stop me.

Dear sweet baby,

I hope you know I loved you from the start.

Even though I didn’t get much time with you to watch you grow and become the awesome person you turned out to be, I was so proud of you for being genuinely you.

Dear sweet baby,

Thank you for giving us 21 years of you.

I know it wasn’t easy for you, but it was much appreciated.

Dear sweet baby,

I hope you found peace in your decision.

I hope the other side has been everything you needed in the last 6 years to make up for all of the pain you endured while here with us.

I love you, sweet baby, and I miss you terribly but I’m hopeful that you’re at peace now.