Carousel II

here we go,

again‐

tuning in

turning out

speeding up

crashing out

burning up

burning down

looking up

falling down

facing forward

moving backwards

filling up

on what?

pouring out

to who?

is it worth it?

falling apart

and back together

just to start all over,

again

and again?

putting up the walls

just so they can crumble

again

filling my pen

only to drain the ink

again

and not fill a single void

harder and harder, it is to be here

the water's been over my head

for quite some time now,

and still it rises

again i float,

face down

downstream from hope

living an infinite loop

a vicious cycle i cannot break,

a predictable future i cannot stop

sinking,

only to float back to the top

carried by the current,

again

without a breath of fresh air left

routines i thought i'd left,

have circled back around

again

have bound my smile by the chains of regret

will i ever experience freedom?

or will i forever reap the disaster this carousel has sown?

round and round,

over and over,

held by a matter of time outside of my hands,

again,

and again,

even after i've said,

never again