Being a child you have very little freedom-
But shouldn’t a parent be there when you need’em.
All the other kids on the block ate everyday
I was lucky if I every had a place to lay
Money was always a problem in my family
But money was one of the reasons I lost my sanity
See your greed always came first no matter the cost
Your greed always came first no matter how much we lost
Do you understand how toxic you are
Seeing you walk home late from the bar
Seeing you almost get hit by a car
I was only a CHILD
I AM STILL ONLY A CHILD
do you understand how I took care of children only a few years younger than me because you couldn’t
Do you understand I did what a parent should do and a child shouldn’t
Do you understand how it scars someone to hear you having sex with men for money on the other side of the wall
And for what so you could get stoned while I sit in a corner and bawl
Did you understand that on multiple occasions I tried to kill myself
Because I couldn’t live with myself
Do you understand how uncomfortable it was when the older guy you dated made me sit on his lap
It was even worse when he came into my room while You were taking a nap
Do you understand how bruised I was when the man you married hit me
He would knock the breath out of me, I couldn’t breath
Do You understand how physical abuse is nothing compared to verbal abuse
Because when it comes from your mom it’s worse
Do you understand how many times you put me in terrible situations
You made me have terrible thoughts, made me want to make terrible decisions
Do you understand HOW MUCH I HATE YOU
But do you understand how hard it is to hate you
Do you understand that you are my mother and I will never forget it
But Do you understand you were toxic
Do you understand you are my sickness
Do you understand you must beg me for forgivness
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