How can I be jealous of my own fantasy?
Rebellious, in this ugly, ugly reality
Sinking, deeper and deeper into this black sea
The coldest look of apathy rests on my face
Loneliness strong enough to taste
Left unconvinced, that every today is a gift
I know, tomorrow is not promised, but...
Still, I make no haste
I've given up on this race set before me
Let go of all belief
That there's any way out of this ugly, ugly reality
A forsaken actuality
I cannot believe, that I am jealous of my own fantasy
Oh how I wish things could be as I wish they would be‐
Peace, on a not so murky sea
Gentle waves, that may be below the line marking what I see
Storms come and go,
Or so I was told, but...
These clouds have decided to make the place over my head their home
How long?...
Since I last saw the sun‐
How long?...
Before I can finally be done‐
With this beautiful envy...
Jealous of my own fantasy,
My capacity has been flooded, I can only sink
Nothing can soothe, not even the stiffest of drinks
With These Walls on the brink of another collapse
This chapter entitled Beautiful Envy might just be my last–
About the Creator
JM
Personally, writing began as a creative outlet, to be a means of processing and venting emotion, but it has become so much more. Something I want not to be just relatable, enjoyable and a good read, but to reach someone who is in need.
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