Ate all my entropy up

I seemed to have some side of trouble added to my morning eggs—-I had a little more time to look at my entropy that piled up like clean laundry on the bed

I ate it up, it seemed to disagree with my insides—-eating me up inside

Crawling my vessels with pronunciation, proud of its loudness even as all the outside stomped on how big the loudness was

When I saw a lady reading steadily, “Fifty Shades of Grey,” I felt like there was a big gap of light between us, strangers that had never crossed our paths, books like, “Catcher in the Rye,”

She wouldn’t blink an eye—-or would she?

But the fact is, it didn’t matter

Matter is matter, material is subjective

I’m floating around like an alien balloon that doesn’t realize it was never invited to the event itself

The party rejects me, like life, like love

Yes, God may love me, but I’m a sinner

Yes, I may not be perfect, but I’m a powerful lover

I give too much & get less in return, someone once said,

It felt more pathetic than a punch to my face

I ate up all my entropy today

I ate it up so the loudness don’t smell like regret

Like a sizzling, hot mess in the kitchen, all set up for good intentions with a nice cup of coffee too,

Eaten up by the monster inside all of us

Who left the book we needed to read by the bedside

Leaving family all alone and calling it what it is, love & family & love

Read that hot (hopeful) garbage with glee, I told the woman in my head

Maybe it actually gets her through the damn day.