Anxiously Attached

My heart and mind are racing. Perhaps they deceive me.

Paranoid with anxiety fearing that you’ll leave me.

Coming from a childhood where caretaker love was inconsistent.

So now my quest for constant reassurance is persistent.

I over analyze every action and every word.

Looking for valid proof that you’ll kick me to the curve.

I’ll put you on a pedestal and say it’s my love for you.

Soon it turns into misplaced worship and I’ll smother you.

I always have premonitions of a stranded me.

Living in constant fear that one day you’ll abandon me.

Say you love me, but once I’m in my feelings there’s no stopping me.

My overbearing emotions lead to self fulfilling prophecy.

Chasing unattainable validation I never seem to catch.

A self manufactured torture chamber. I am the anxiously attached.