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Anesthesia

My body remembers…

By Rayn BPublished about a year ago Updated about a year ago 1 min read

You don’t remember the surgery.

The sensation of the incision,

Instruments adjusting organs,

Cauterizing, extracting...

//

The needle they insert

And the burn of anesthesia

Are the last memories of discomfort

Before waking up

To the stitches, the aftercare

The healing.

//

You didn’t witness

What caused the pain,

But you know it happened.

There’s a logical reason

Why you are hurting

And instructions on how

To have the best recovery.

//

But imagine your body

Acting like it’s been through

Something...

Traumatic.

//

But there’s no memory to blame.

No recollection of why:

Images

Words

The smell of alcohol on breath and in sweat

A hug that lasts too long

A promise that “…you can trust me…”

//

Piercing

Like a nail gun through skin

And I must be careful

Not to wince

And give myself away.

//

And one day,

Someone you find

To confide in

And share your symptoms

Proposes a cause

To all these effects...

//

“Perhaps you had

Invasive surgery...

Long ago,

At a time you possessed

The mind of a child

With no ability to comprehend,

Stop from happening,

Object to...

That no one told you about?”

//

And then,

It all starts to make sense.

social commentarysurreal poetrysad poetryheartbreak

About the Creator

Rayn B

I have been writing poetry and lyrics since I was a child. I have recently started writing short scripts for “found footage” horror TikToks. I dream of writing books and full length screenplays. Thanks for being in this community with me!

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Comments (5)

  • Rachel Deeming6 months ago

    I found this quite harrowing. I'm reading a book called The Paper Palace at the moment which has similar themes. This was hard-hitting.

  • Pōlani Monderen 7 months ago

    I found your poem a long time ago, and it's been saved. Tonight, through it, I found the rest of your collection, and every poem resonates. Thank you for sharing this. Oh, how intricately woven it all existence is and how our body keeps the score - knowingly and yet not always knowingly.

  • Lamar Wigginsabout a year ago

    Wow! This was thought provoking and left me wondering about myself. Great visual and flow to this. Top story in my book!

  • Allie Bickertonabout a year ago

    Wow! 🥺

  • Cathy holmesabout a year ago

    Oh my God. This is heartwrenching. You are an incredible writer. Thank you for sharing.

Rayn BWritten by Rayn B

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