A Timeless Existence (Journal Entry)

I have a vision.

Myself, with my own grand palace of gothic architecture, and an evergreen endless garden- no, a forest - in my name.

I do not wish to claim the earth but rather have a piece of it as my little private sanctuary.

I want to befriend the earth, make allies with the spirits and gain blessings to inhabit the land as such - to be able to bathe naked through the forest knowing a man dare not witness let alone approach me, for as I said, I will be alone.

I want to travel and make friends - not the passing by ones but loyal, teachers to me like I, them. The kind that would visit me and teach me new languages, ways of life - how to love in a thousand different soul languages, and for me to bare the art within my soul to them in return.

I want to learn archery, horseback riding if my feeble bones allow it - to paint and read every morning in a different corner of the forest surrounding my palace every day, and to be able to wear a red cloak around my candle-lit halls at night just because I thrive off of the ambiance of fantasy. Because it feels more like home than anything else.

If not a coven then a group of fellow witches that gather where I live to perform and rejoice in rituals, dancing, and music - especially on each of our birthdays. To run to the sea and dance around fires under the shadow of the trees - to be able to host annual balls of elegance, masquerades... And not with guests that I’m supposed to, or expected to invite, but with the loyal friends I’ve made across my travels.

I want to have a family crest only passed down to those born through my direct bloodline - engraved on the walls and in intricate necklaces with crystals, silver, and gold bending over their backs...

To have it all be an enchanted family heirloom blessed by gods that live on beyond the human measures of forever.

I want to live in a fashion that is timeless, to profit off of my writing and art so much that I’m able to afford the blessings that are needed to manifest this vision - to become as much of the art as I will always be the artist. I ache to live - not like how people tell me I’m supposed to aspire to live, in the fashion and manner of ‘our time’. I don’t care about any of it.

I need to express and mirror the essence of my soul into this human life it’s experiencing.

I yearn...

I will - be timeless.