A lasting Love

I turn the light off and plug in my phone,

Another night in the chapter where I tuck myself into bed alone,

On another night, closing my eyes at the time I chose,

And a blanket set on high keeping me warm,

The number of months I have spent,

Wondering if I will ever find love again,

Understanding I still have time and life is long,

But how many years will pass before the love is no longer young,

A deeply desired dream that will never become,

Maybe I wasn't meant to have that love story all along,

I was given a brother who found his person right in front of him,

And my sister had her person walk right in,

Maybe I was created for a beautiful life long-lived,

But a dreamer of a story I will never be the main character in,

With all that to say, that I'm not ready to live in a cookie-cutter home,

Where children are born to grow and roam,

Where my life becomes more than just my own,

But oh how I crave to have a partner to know and be known,

Or at least the confirmation that I too can be chosen to be loved,

How everything that makes me me, is enough,

Someone who wants to build in an equal trust,

A person to help carry your half when everything feels tough,

Most days I wish I could turn the yearning off just like the light,

Be content with my own journey, my own love of life,

But I have a belief system, rooted in hope that depleting over time,

I guess not all that have love and are kind,

Get to have a love that lasts a lifetime,

I do feel grateful for the life I have been given,

Whole dreams, a storyteller,a glass-full girl who is passion-driven,

But who wrote my book to be the girl who was never chosen,

To find a lasting love within another person.