29

Not afraid to admit ,sometimes fear gets the better of me

Held hostage at his ill-organised tea party

There is so much I am yet to prove to myself

Too focused on not letting people down, I have severely ignored my health

At the mirror wondering " Today, what heart are we wearing on our sleeve"

Conceal my purple eye so no one knows I am in a losing battle with sleep

I wonder what I have to achieve before I can fully feel proud of me

Sacrifices begat sacrifices, a fee I am bound to pay handsomely

So focused on the road ,I forgot to enjoy the field of roses

I can't even talk to Him, tongue tied I must remind Him of Moses

28 we did the work, 29 better come with all the produce

But I dont know if thats where my happiness lies, should suffice

Where I am supposed to be isn't where I'm at, trying to be okay with it

If I pretend to, will the mask become the only real me in it?

Do I have to keep swapping till I find one that let's me breathe?

Too many shutdoors, I no longer carry the keys with me