Introducing...

I would like you all to meet my husband's puppy, Blondie.

The man who said we had enough animals and did not need more brought home a puppy behind my back.

Now we have a leopard gecko, two cats, and four dogs again. (Sadly, I had given my chickens away when preparing to move my mother up here.)

Blondie was born December 4, 2024, and now weighs 45 pounds. She is the pup from a friend's son's dog. Yes, she is hyper, but also very lovable. She insists on cuddles from the whole family.

I call her Blondie, Princess Buttercup, B****, Dammit, Drop That, Don't Do It, Go Lay Down, Sit Down, Leave The Cat Alone, Get Down, Calm Down, Sh*thead, Don't Eat It, Don't Lick It, Get Out Of There, Get Over Here, Be Good, Get Off Me, Honey, and Sweetheart.

My youngest girl, Bonnie, takes Blondie on long walks in the woods, has taught her to shake and give out high-fives, and allows her to cuddle in bed. My oldest daughter, Courtney, started the never-ending game of fetch (Blondie does not know when to stop!), and they both cuddle while watching TV on the couch or napping.

She loves to go on truck and ATV rides with my husband, especially to the back of the property where she can run through the fields chasing rabbits. Surprisingly, she has not gotten carsick yet - unbelievable in these Ozark foothills.

Blondie plays reasonably well with the other animals, considering she's a hyperactive large-breed puppy. The older dogs - Duke, Daisy, and Frodo - quickly let her know when they have had enough. As for the cats, Klingon was quick-witted and stood up to her when she was a tiny puppy, while poor, naive Dutch thought he had a cool new playmate just his size when she was first brought home. Now we have to watch her closely with Dutch, making sure she doesn't hurt and wallor him to death. So far, Blondie has outgrown all the animals except for Daisy, who still stands taller than her, and she's not done growing!

Now, you would think my husband would be in Seventh Heaven with his new puppy that he snuck into our lives. Seriously, you would even think he would be gloating and rubbing it in that he has such a spoiled rotten little mongrel to call his own. You would think so. He is not, though.

Instead, he has been pouting since he brought her home. There was even a day when he was on the verge of a temper tantrum. He has been so upset and broken up that I don't know whether to see it as comical or have him admitted.

You see, he is torn up over one thing. Blondie chose me. She wants to sleep with me. She cries when I leave and gets excited when I return. When the lightning strikes and the thunder rolls, she looks for me. If she is hungry or needs to go out, she nibbles on my feet to let me know.

He is angry that he paid money for a dog for himself, that is not his dog. (I got him to admit to paying for her, just not how much...) He is upset that she chose me.

Maybe I was a little harsh in my comeback to him. Perhaps I was not. I do not know. I looked at him and said, "It surprises you that the dog chose me? All the animals chose me. I'm the Mama."

Daisy and Duke belong to Courtney. Both dogs want to be around me.

My husband brought Frodo here because a niece was moving into a place where she couldn't have pets. She's never returned to get him. It is okay. He has become my dog.

Klingon belongs to Bonnie, but he bothers me for everything he needs. He sleeps with me, purring on my legs.

Dutch belongs to Bonnie but is confused and attacks me like part of his litter. Plus he sleeps with me, on my shoulder, purring.

Penelope the gecko belongs to Bonnie and Bonnie alone. She never leaves her terrarium until cleaning day.

Seriously, though, it's not like I went out of my way to steal his dog from him either. After all, I would much rather have a flock of chickens that poop out breakfast and eat all the nuisance bugs. A clowder of cats is way better than dogs, too. Why would anyone in their right mind want four dogs demanding their attention? I mean, it is a constant bathroom, feeding, and watering at my house. That's not to include all the de-ticking and medications we have to hide in cheese just to keep them healthy. Owning one dog is like having a toddler in the house; having four is like starting a daycare.

Do not get me wrong. I love my family's dogs. But when is enough enough? Will they finally stop bringing dogs home when you can not see me anymore? When I am squished by all the pouncing, bouncing puppies, will they finally say they decide to stop?

With my family, you can never tell. If they see a stray, hurt animal, you can guarantee it will come home with them - another baby to add to all the ones they have already brought in.