When It All Falls Apart

I think the first four words of today's quote should be nothing new to us. I think we would have to be incredibly naïve and foolish to believe we can cruise through life without anything tragic, painful, devastating, adverse, hurtful, or challenging, to us. It may not be very encouraging or inspiring, but we need to understand what is fact, and accept it. There is one significant factor about bad things happening though, that highlights a significant gap between one individual and another, regarding their character, and that is how we each react and respond to it. When facing adversity, hardship, challenge, tragedy, loss, failure, pain, heartache, and all those circumstances that we would associate with something bad happening to us, or in our lives, it's only natural to dive into a range of different emotions in response. We are human after all, so it's not as easy as just pretending such bad circumstances and events are happening in our life, simply brushing them off, and walking away with a huge smile on our face. These negative circumstances and events are naturally going to cause us sadness, grief, hurt, anger, frustration, disappointment, betrayal, and the like. For instance, with the death of a loved one, we are not simply going to rejoice, be jumping for joy, or brimming with happiness. Naturally, we are going to feel sadness, we are going to feel sorrow, and we will grieve. Through these such emotions though, it doesn't mean we still can't possess positivity, promise, and hope, for our own future. It's a classic example of the different ways in which we can react and respond. We can curse, swear, be angry, and carry on about how life is so unfair, and continue living with a sense of bitterness in our heart, or we can accept that, as much as there is complete sadness and sorrow that our loved one has passed away, what's happened is outside of our control, and we need to ensure we are looking after ourselves, which includes being focused on our future.

When it all falls apart for us in life, it's our reaction and response that ultimately define our character, along with what then transforms in our next chapter. Adversity, challenge, failure, and all those other negative circumstances I listed above, all test us so intensely, and we basically go into that good old "fight or flight" mode. We either accept what's happening to us, tackle it head on, and then look to resolve the issues that are within our control, or we bury our head in our lap, feel sorry for ourselves, and we allow the circumstances to completely overwhelm us. We either succumb to failure, or we use it to drive us to work harder and persevere. We either blame our unhappiness and our circumstances on external things, including other people, or we take ownership of our decisions, actions, and errors, and make changes to improve our situation. We either continue to suffer in financial hardship, and seek out charity and others to continually help us, or we become proactive in seeking out better financially profitable options, along with budgeting more strictly. We either retaliate and react in anger to someone who has emotionally hurt us and criticized us, or we remain calm, decline to engage in their negative mind games, and simply walk away. We can continually focus on playing the victim in life, believing that everything is against us, and whinging and complaining about it, or we can continually focus on the things that do go right for us, and show appreciation and gratitude for all the blessings we have. We can continually focus on all that we don't have, and feel hard done by, or we can continually focus on all that we do have, and be thankful for it.

All those above examples are the difference between maturity and immaturity, between being proactive and inactive, between being accountable and unaccountable, between self-control and indiscipline. What we choose to focus on is going to dictate how our life pans out. If we are continually going to focus on the negatives in life, and be a victim of circumstance, we are never going to achieve success and happiness, it's as simple as that! We don't have to like all the bad things that happen to us in life, by any means, but we do need to accept some circumstances are beyond our control. For the circumstances that are within our control, we need to become accountable, adaptable, and proactive in correcting them. If we choose to allow our emotions to get the better of us, and continue to wallow in all the negatives, then we are granting our mindset to create further negativity. What we choose to focus on, we create and determine. Not only that, but how we react and respond is going to define as us a person. How can we expect others to show us respect, kindness, and courtesy, if we are someone who is possessed by anger, frustration, and negativity? If we react to circumstances and situations with acceptance, calmness, control, a steely determination, and a positive attitude, we are showing leadership, which generates admiration and respect. In those times of adversity, when bad things happen to us, there is always opportunity. As hard as these times may be, we need to seek out what life is trying to teach us, or encourage us to do. We have the opportunity to use the pain, the hardship, and the challenge, to our advantage in becoming our superpower, and as a platform to creating success and happiness. When it all falls apart, we need to make sure that we don't fall apart either. We need to have the strength, the courage, and the resilience, to work through these hard times, and prove to ourselves that we are not going to allow such times to destroy our life. Override those negative emotions, exercise emotional control, and show restraint when reacting and responding to all the bad times. Hold your head up high, focus on your goals, create the future of your desire, and be prepared to work hard, because although life may not be easy, it doesn't mean we can't be happy!

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