In 2009 I went on my first (and only) Caribbean cruise. I tend to overplan things and when I try something new, I want to know as much about what to expect as possible.
I ran across a website where you could read reviews of your specific cruise from recent excursions. This was the same cruise line, the same ship, the same crew, the same itinerary as the one that I booked. The only thing that varied from one date to the next was the weather.
When I read the reviews I was completely amazed. Hundreds of people on the exact same cruise had the most varied experiences.
Some declared it was the worst food they had every tasted and other people said the food was divine. Some people proclaimed the crew was rude and lazy and other's were pampered beyond their wildest dreams. Some people said the ship's decor was old and dated and other passengers said it was modern and beautiful.
They were all on the same ship for the same cruise!!!
Why would so many people sharing the same experience feel as if they had such varied outcomes? The answer comes down to 2 different laws of existence; The Law of Attraction and the Law of we see what we want to see.(Which isn't really a defined "Law" but a phenomenon.)
The Law of Attraction is pretty simple. If you expect to have a good time, if you day dream about having a good time, if you plan to have a good time, you put those good vibes out into the Universe to be returned to you as good times.
Conversely, if you constantly worry about every thing that can go wrong, you put negative vibes out into the Universe and quite often what you think about, comes about.
But the Law of Attraction doesn't fully explain my cruise review experience. All of the passengers basically shared the same experience. Even if some worried about bad weather and some expected smooth sailing, they all experienced the same weather for their trip.
The paradox lies deeper in our psyche.
What we look for is what we will see.
This phenomenon takes the responsibility for creating our own existence to a whole new level.
If you go through life with an overly critical eye, either for yourself or for your fellow man, you will always find something to complain about.
On the flip side, if you look for the beauty in life, you will always find something to admire. Beauty is everywhere, but sometimes you have to look harder to see it.
Have you ever heard the phrase in retail, "If you always experience a negative retail experience maybe you are the problem!" Anyone who has worked in retail knows that some people won't be happy no matter what you do, and that is okay. Their experience is a function of their outlook on life and not how well you do your job.
Not every negative experience is solely a product of our outlook on life. People do make mistakes, the weather is sometimes bad, kids do get cranky, etc. But if bad experiences are predominantly what you find in your life, you might very well be the problem.
Understanding the phenomena of what you look for is what you find can be a liberating experience. Transformational even. This understanding can sow the seeds of creating a better life.
You don't have to go all Pollyanna into this. Just understand that your experiences in life are based on your outlook in life. Other people's experiences in life are based on their outlook in life.
To take it a step further, people's experiences with YOU and their opinions of YOU are largely based on their outlook in life.
What people think of you is none of your business. Everyone that you will ever meet will have a view of who you are in their head. But no one really knows who you are but you. A thousand people can believe a thousand different realities of who you are and none of them are accurate. Even our view of ourselves isn't completely accurate because it is colored by our experiences and our relationships with other people.
But if we can create whatever opinion or experience we want, why not create something positive? Choose to see the good in others and more often than not, you will see the good in them. People will show up in your life reflecting good behavior and those who don't fit with your expectation of good behavior will tend to fall by the wayside because their attitude no longer matches your rising vibrational frequency.
You will never create 100% positive experiences. Life is about balance and growth and we grow the most when we go through learning experiences. If things weren't quite up to par from time to time, we wouldn't appreciate the greatness life has to offer.
What I am addressing here is perpetual negativity.
We all have had at least one friend or relative that complains about EVERYTHING! Being around them is a real drag...literally! They are dragging down your vibration because they are sucking energy out of your very soul.
If someone who is perpetually negative can bring that negativity/positivity ratio up to 50/50, their life can change dramatically. If that person is you, you have the power to change your life dramatically just by looking for the good in life 50% of the time. If you can tip the scales to 51%, all the better.
That's easy for you to say Georgia, you don't live my life! Nope, I sure don't and I understand that sometimes life can feel and look impossible. Sometimes we can feel completely stuck and there appears to be nowhere to go, especially not up.
But there is, and things will ALWAYS change. Nothing ever stays the same and every little nudge we give life to the positive, no matter how small, will help move things along.
Dr. Wayne Dyer tells the story of meeting a woman walking along the beach in his hometown. She tells him she is new to the area and asks him what are the people like in that area. He asks her in return, what were the people like where she just moved from. She explained they were horrible. Dr. Dyer answered with, that is what you will find here.
Our past way of thinking shaped our past experiences. If you want to create new experiences that are more positive, all we have to do is start with creating new ways of seeing the world. One step at a time, one thought at a time. No matter how bad someone appears or how negative a situation you may find yourself in, you can always find something positive, no matter how tiny. All you have to do is look.